things they never tell you about babies

so i'm going to be making a short list here of things they never tell you about babies which i've learned since i know you all have either never had babies or you all are having one tomorrow.....
1 -- they cry all the time.
actually this one I sort of knew because I am accustomed to people saying 'stop being such a crybaby', etc. But now I know the full impact of it, and usually find out that the crying is in relation to something I did -- treated the baby too much like a sack of potatoes, exposed the baby to unfamiliar air while changing her, made the baby wear a diaper, assumed the baby wanted a bottle when the baby really wanted to look at herself in the mirror, didn't figure out the secret for getting the baby to fall asleep fast enough, left the baby alone to contemplate mobile fishies for too long, let one aggravation happen after another one had recently occurred (that's the one you really want to avoid), etc. etc.
2 -- their heads pulsate from time to time
so I knew babies had soft spots, which led to anxieties about sharp pointy things falling from nowhere. (Apparently the skin is really tough and protective up there, so if you touch it a little you aren't necessarily squishing their brain...) But I did not know that sometimes you can see the pulse there. It's a little freaky. I noticed it when I was nursing her the other day and called the doctor. I was afraid that she wasn't getting enough food because her soft spot pulsated and then seemed to sink in slightly. I'm still not convinced that that wasn't the case. However, the doctor was and informed me that she has actually gained almost a pound since our last visit a week ago.....
3 -- they get really hot and sweaty at night
this one didn't freak me out so much, but it did make me wonder if covering up the baby in tons of blankets was really necessary, as just wearing a cozy sleeper seemed to turn her into a furnace at night. I assume they are hard at work growing like crazy. Also, we co-sleep and the baby likes to kick me in the middle of the night when she wants to eat -- so I know she's working on getting bigger. (10 pounds 11 ounces with clothes on as of Wednesday.)
4 -- sometimes they forget to breathe
this is a scary one. baby is nursing or sleeping and suddenly you notice that nothing is going on with regular breathing. They snap out of it and catch their breath and suddenly look relieved. I thought my baby had asthma or something already, but I asked the doctor and he said they all do that, and then give a shudder of relief once they breathe again.
5 - umbilical cords falling off can smell bad
our pediatrician warned us that the umbilical cord falling off would freak us out, so we were braced. the blood oozing out the sides did not phase us. however, no one told us that it would smell bad potentially. it's full of old blood, and so it smells like old blood which doesn't smell good. we consulted the internet, which sent us into a panic when we were informed that we need to call the doctor if a bad smell is present. apparently they meant another bad smell. it was worrisome too because when you actually get a look inside it looks like some kind of yellow rubber cement that just doesn't seem right. and then there are websites telling you to look out for pus. we have since learned to take internet medical advice with a hefty grain of salt.....since she was just fine and not suffering from septicemia or whatever they thought it was....

I'll let you know if there are any other tips, even though you all probably either know this or will not remember until you have your own kids, at which point you will be inundated by so much unsolicited advice that you will forget to prioritize mine....(because I've learned that everyone wants you to take their advice first.....)